Kinky sex questions to ask your girlfriend. 30 Dirty Would You Rather Questions to Ask Your Lover.



Kinky sex questions to ask your girlfriend

Kinky sex questions to ask your girlfriend

March 29, By Dexx 85 Comments A bird and a fish may fall in love, but where would they build a home? And you likely spend a good amount of time playing with it, fantasizing about it, or living it. You may have always known you were kinky — since before you even knew what sex was, you were drawn to situations and depictions involving power exchange and bondage. My point is — people are either kinky or they are not.

Vanilla people cannot be made kinky, just as kinky cannot be made vanilla. And so when a kinky person and a vanilla person date and maybe even fall in love , it can never end well. And yet this is this is a problem that comes up time and time again, played out by almost every kinky person I have met and I know a lot of kinky people , sometimes over and over again.

I have had several long terms relationships each more than 2 years since my late teens. In each case, we met and felt a strong chemistry and a deep attraction. Each of my exes was beautiful in her own distinct way — and engaging, funny, likeable.

Of course, we had ups and downs in the course of our relationships, as all couples do. But they were good women, and each time we laughed together, grew and experienced new things, and traveled to exotic and wonderful places. And yet in each case, kink was a divide between us. And ultimately, the reason that the relationships could not last. In fact, they were quite sexual and adventurous in their own way. They were up for trying new things, playing with some toys and trying out experiences.

I, like you, am kinky. And since joining the kinky community, I have met hundreds of kinky people in LA and all over the world. And each time I do, I feel that connection of speaking with someone who is like me, who gets me. And from my conversations with all of these kinky people I have met, I have heard so many stories just like mine. Of years or even decades from teenage years through adulthood, when these kinksters were figuring out their own identity and sexuality.

Trying to understand why they liked these things that were strange and deviant to regular folks, realizing they needed to keep certain desires to themselves. And then reigniting and fully realizing those desires upon the thrilling discovery of the kink community. All of these people had similar stories of ex-boyfriends, ex-girlfriends, ex-husbands, ex-wives, who they had tried to introduce to kink.

Trying to get their man to dominate them, or get their girlfriend to tie them up. So many relationships where ultimately they failed because the kinky person could not get their needs met.

Because vanilla people cannot be made kinky. And it is terrible. It had made me question my kinkiness at times. Made me wonder if I can push it aside, forget about it, grow out of it, bury it.

So I would say this: The further into it you get, the more difficult and heart-wrenching it will become for both of you to leave later. After all, sometimes it takes a little while before someone opens up about things like this. I do think that is pretty rare in western culture now though — given the massive publicity and exposure that BDSM has received in recent times. My advice is to end it.

Be gentle about it, be compassionate about it, communicate with them, support them. And there may be some pretty gnarly ones… not the least of which is marriage and children. But what I can tell you is about all the people I have met in the community who finally did realize they needed to embrace their kinky selves. Some of whom waited until they were in their 30s, or 40s, or 50s, or 60s, or 70s, before biting the bullet and doing it and that once they did, they realized that they had finally found themselves, their community, their people.

And almost all wished that they had the courage to do it much, much sooner. There is one exception that I would add to all of this. Occasionally, a kinky person may be in a relationship with someone vanilla where the relationship is so open, trusting, positive and strong, that the kinky person can go out and explore the community and play with others, without it damaging or impacting on the bond of that relationship.

I have seen this work long-term in a couple of cases. So if you are in this situation then you are very fortunate and you should make the most of your freedom to explore.

Have you found yourself in a relationship with a vanilla person that you wished was kinky? I would love to hear about it in the comments section below. Writer, photographer, hedonist, Dom. After years of at-home BDSM, Dexx finally embraced the kink community and met many fantastic fellow kinksters in the scene. Along the way, it occurred to him that it would be just super if there was a magazine-style web site which catered to people interested in BDSM, and he recruited some of his friends to help create it.

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31+ Dirty Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend



Kinky sex questions to ask your girlfriend

March 29, By Dexx 85 Comments A bird and a fish may fall in love, but where would they build a home? And you likely spend a good amount of time playing with it, fantasizing about it, or living it. You may have always known you were kinky — since before you even knew what sex was, you were drawn to situations and depictions involving power exchange and bondage. My point is — people are either kinky or they are not. Vanilla people cannot be made kinky, just as kinky cannot be made vanilla.

And so when a kinky person and a vanilla person date and maybe even fall in love , it can never end well. And yet this is this is a problem that comes up time and time again, played out by almost every kinky person I have met and I know a lot of kinky people , sometimes over and over again. I have had several long terms relationships each more than 2 years since my late teens. In each case, we met and felt a strong chemistry and a deep attraction. Each of my exes was beautiful in her own distinct way — and engaging, funny, likeable.

Of course, we had ups and downs in the course of our relationships, as all couples do. But they were good women, and each time we laughed together, grew and experienced new things, and traveled to exotic and wonderful places. And yet in each case, kink was a divide between us. And ultimately, the reason that the relationships could not last. In fact, they were quite sexual and adventurous in their own way. They were up for trying new things, playing with some toys and trying out experiences.

I, like you, am kinky. And since joining the kinky community, I have met hundreds of kinky people in LA and all over the world. And each time I do, I feel that connection of speaking with someone who is like me, who gets me. And from my conversations with all of these kinky people I have met, I have heard so many stories just like mine.

Of years or even decades from teenage years through adulthood, when these kinksters were figuring out their own identity and sexuality. Trying to understand why they liked these things that were strange and deviant to regular folks, realizing they needed to keep certain desires to themselves.

And then reigniting and fully realizing those desires upon the thrilling discovery of the kink community. All of these people had similar stories of ex-boyfriends, ex-girlfriends, ex-husbands, ex-wives, who they had tried to introduce to kink. Trying to get their man to dominate them, or get their girlfriend to tie them up.

So many relationships where ultimately they failed because the kinky person could not get their needs met. Because vanilla people cannot be made kinky. And it is terrible. It had made me question my kinkiness at times. Made me wonder if I can push it aside, forget about it, grow out of it, bury it. So I would say this: The further into it you get, the more difficult and heart-wrenching it will become for both of you to leave later.

After all, sometimes it takes a little while before someone opens up about things like this. I do think that is pretty rare in western culture now though — given the massive publicity and exposure that BDSM has received in recent times. My advice is to end it. Be gentle about it, be compassionate about it, communicate with them, support them.

And there may be some pretty gnarly ones… not the least of which is marriage and children. But what I can tell you is about all the people I have met in the community who finally did realize they needed to embrace their kinky selves. Some of whom waited until they were in their 30s, or 40s, or 50s, or 60s, or 70s, before biting the bullet and doing it and that once they did, they realized that they had finally found themselves, their community, their people.

And almost all wished that they had the courage to do it much, much sooner. There is one exception that I would add to all of this. Occasionally, a kinky person may be in a relationship with someone vanilla where the relationship is so open, trusting, positive and strong, that the kinky person can go out and explore the community and play with others, without it damaging or impacting on the bond of that relationship. I have seen this work long-term in a couple of cases.

So if you are in this situation then you are very fortunate and you should make the most of your freedom to explore. Have you found yourself in a relationship with a vanilla person that you wished was kinky? I would love to hear about it in the comments section below. Writer, photographer, hedonist, Dom.

After years of at-home BDSM, Dexx finally embraced the kink community and met many fantastic fellow kinksters in the scene. Along the way, it occurred to him that it would be just super if there was a magazine-style web site which catered to people interested in BDSM, and he recruited some of his friends to help create it. You may also be interested in:

Kinky sex questions to ask your girlfriend

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2 Comments

  1. What are your hobbies? What will happen if our sex life slows down? Have you ever had the feeling you were being watched?

  2. Do have any type of bad habit? She believes that one day can change everything and wakes up

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