A warning to anyone reading this: This post is an immature, irrational rant. I don't need anyone telling me that I'm being is ridiculous. Whoops, forgot to mention that this definitely includes "TMI" Anyway, rant begins here: A little over a week ago, I heard what I believed to be my parents having sex when I was making my way back to my room some time during the night.
My room is only a few feet away from my parent's, so naturally I had to pass it to get to mine. I was caught off guard, however, when I heard my Mom making moaning noises. Judging by her tone and the rhythm, I "just knew" what it was I was hearing - so I ran into my room and tried my hardest to distract myself listening to music, googling random things, playing video games, watching tv, etc , but despite being tired, I didn't go to sleep until 5 in the morning because I was still too anxious from what I had heard just a few hours earlier.
And that anxiety has yet to subside. Now, I know it isn't rational of me to still be bothered by this - I know it just means my parents still love each other, and it's great that they're doing something that makes them both happy. But ever since that night, I'm afraid I'll hear them again..
Just to give you an idea: When my Mom used to ride on her exercise bike she would turn on her mp3 player and lip sync to it, but she tends to "breathe" the words - I could even hear that, despite both the door to her room and my room being closed. I knew it would be silly of me to go to my parents about it, though, since that was the first time I remember hearing actual moans coming from their room in all of the years I've lived with them. Plus, it's not like they wanted me to hear them.
Going to them would just make them feel awkward and reduce their pleasure because they'd be worrying about me hearing them again - so I made myself stay quiet, even though the anxiety was keeping me up at night. The next time Dad came home, however my Dad works as a temp 4 hours away from home. We only get to see him on the weekends , Dad lured Mom upstairs to show her something. His face looked suggestive, which made me uncomfortable.
I was concerned it was for something later that night, and I couldn't forget about it. As the night got closer, I cracked. I couldn't take the anxiety anymore, so I made my Mom get on FaceBook, and I told her about what I heard through chat, and mentioned how the anxiety from it has been keeping me up at night.
I assured her I wasn't trying to make them stop what they were doing, I just wanted them to keep the noise down. I still wasn't completely relieved of stress that night, however, so I ended up staying up late again.
Not a sound you usually hear at 12 a. That thing Dad wanted to show Mom was a vibrating sex toy!! Even after getting some sleep, my anxiety continued to grow.
I wanted to talk to Mom again, but I made myself hold it in. That is, until I heard my Dad masturbating later in the afternoon, and I couldn't escape from the sounds because I was on the toilet with bad stomach cramps Dad likely had no idea I could hear him because he was upstairs.
But the upstairs bathroom is right above the downstairs bathroom - meaning I can hear everything that goes on in the bathroom upstairs. Despite being extremely stressed, I didn't ask to talk to Mom until she mentioned that Dad was mad at her "for no reason".
This wasn't long after I heard Dad upstairs, and while I was in the bathroom I remember hearing Dad as he was going up the stairs and Mom asking him where he was going - Dad didn't answer. Which I found unusual because he always answers that question. I didn't think anything of it until Mom said Dad was mad at her, which made me remember when Dad lured her to their room the other day - it was the same.
He didn't answer her when she asked why he wanted her to come upstairs, he just gave her "the look". I assumed he was trying the same move, so I got Mom on Facebook again subjects like this are way too nerve-wracking for me to speak to someone face-to-face , and told her that I think he was upset because he had to "take care of business" himself, because just before he suddenly got angry, I heard what he was doing in the bathroom.
Mom then said I'm probably right, because he did mention that he took his meds Dad has low testosterone, which often affects a persons sex drive. Later, Mom got to talk to Dad and apologize for not catching on.
I was glad that Dad wasn't mad at her anymore - but this also means that they don't just wait until night to have sex, like I originally thought, which, unfortunately, explained all these odd one-hour-long "naps" they would take together. Just out of the blue, all of the sudden they were both tired, and decided to go lay down together for awhile. And although I found it odd, I didn't question it because I actually believed that they genuinely liked taking naps together.
And because of how much I've learned in just a little over a week, I can now pick up on their "signals". As in, I can read little hints they give each other to tell the other they're "ready". Everything So now instead of just being stressed when the two of them "go to bed" at night, I'm stressed throughout the entire day, knowing something could happen at any time, and I'm at risk of hearing it because sound travels easily through the house, I can't go anywhere because I don't drive, I have no friends to visit when I know my parents are about to have sex, and I can't just tell them to "stop", because that would be stupid, not to mention rude.
Thus, here I am, writing an unorganized rant in attempt to pass time, until I feel it's safe to lie down and go to sleep. I'm currently wearing headphones and blasting music in my ears so I can't hear anything. This is like the 40th time I've listened to this song now.. Getting really tired of it. It's so bad that as soon as even one of my parents are out of sight, any noise I hear that isn't a bark, chirp or meow, I automatically think I'm hearing them either masturbating or having sex. Even when I can see both of them and know they aren't doing anything of that sort, all I can think about is the fact that I'm going to have to go through the same thing later on that night.
I'm all out of ideas.. I've tried "distracting myself", didn't work. I've tried talking to my parents Or rather, my Mom on FaceBook who later discussed what I said with Dad , didn't help.
I've tried getting as far away from their room as I could so I'm less likely to hear them, but that only helps during the day when the weather is tolerable. Ear plugs would be nice, but there's a few problems: Good ones have to be molded to the wearers ear shape, so it's probably expensive.
Plus I read that they should be replaced every few months, meaning we'd have to keep paying for new ones. The inside is especially sensitive. I can't even wear ear buds to listen to music with. I have to use headphones. And 3 My parents have had some foam ones before and have tried to get me to try them, but every time they tried I would say "No. They'll hurt my ears.
I don't like them", so suddenly coming out and saying "Hey, can we go get me some custom-fit ear plugs? Give me something to stick in my ears so I don't have to hear you two" to them - and I don't want to bother them about it any more than I already have. I need to sleep, though.. And it's been a few hours since I've gone to the bathroom, because I'd have to pass their bedroom to get to the bathroom.
In fact, those cramps I had that day I heard Dad up there? I still have them. The anxiety was preventing me from pooping, and I still can't get rid of them because I won't let myself stay long enough to poop.
I've also noticed a decline in my appetite Help!?