But did God have a plan in mind for sex? What are the freedoms and guidelines? First, God intended sex to be enjoyed between a man and a woman in marriage. God created Eve for Adam because Adam needed a mate comparable to him. He needed companionship, relationship, and intimacy.
You may not take illegitimate delight in what does not belong to you. What does it mean to love your date? We should test our intentions and actions by asking ourselves some questions: But without the commitment of marriage, sex is a shallow illusion of intimacy. It is basically selfish. Consequently, it often becomes a means to manipulate and control others. This easily leads into the strange perversions of sexuality to which we as a sinful, desperate people are prone.
This is far from what God intended for His children. God loves us and wants only the best for us. God has given us all good things to enjoy, sex included John So how will we best enjoy our sexuality? Within the security of a committed marital relationship.
Within a loving marriage there is assurance, accountability, and a commitment to work on the relationship when times are difficult. God leaves that up to us to decide, keeping in mind the principles above. However, it is wise to prepare ourselves before we enter into a romantic relationship. First, set your standards now! Holding hands, warm hugs, and kissing are all natural expressions of true love and genuine care for a person. If a touch like this does not cause you to lust and it is done out of respect for another, it can be considered an appropriate touch.
There are, however, more intimate physical expressions that should be reserved for a married couple. They are designed to stimulate and excite and to culminate in sexual intercourse. These activities should be avoided by a dating couple because their purpose is to prepare the body for sex. Examples of these activities are fondling of breasts or genitals, heavy and passionate kissing, necking, petting, and oral sex.
This list is not conclusive, however. Second, listen to the little voice inside! If you are doing something or are in a situation that is causing you to feel uncomfortable, guilty, or violated, listen to those feelings.
They are there for a reason. Imagine that the person you are dating is your future mate. But now picture that person with someone else on a date. How would you want that date to go?
How far would you want that sexual relationship proceed? What kind of activities would be off limits then? How are you going to leave this person? Is that how you want your potential mate? How do you want your sister to be treated on a date? How do you want your brother to act? This little exercise puts our dating life in perspective, because we all have people so special to us that we want to love and protect them. This is how we should approach the person we are dating — as someone special to be loved and honored.
Waiting for sex until marriage can be difficult. A man and a woman who are tempted to give in to their strong sexual desires will do well to admit their struggle before God, trust Him that He will meet their needs, and use wisdom and self-control to avoid falling into the trap of premarital sex. Will God still love us if we choose the path that leads away from Him? Will He forgive us if we have not lived up to His standard of purity? He and Bathsheba, the wife of Uriah, had sex. David lied and committed murder to try to cover his tracks.
After he was confronted with his sin by the prophet Nathan, he repented and God forgave him. However, David still had to live with the consequences of his choices. He had to live with the fact that he had a man murdered. David suffered greatly because of his choice to have sex with Bathsheba. How will you choose to live? Did this answer your question? By no means do we provide all the answers, but we do our best to provide you with biblically based answers to the questions you may be struggling with.
We also hope to provide you with information that you can use to help others who are struggling to find answers to tough questions.