One thing my AskApril. The reality is, most of us feel more uncomfortable and awkward talking about sex than we do actually having it. Many dare I say most? And finding out what a woman secretly wants can be quite a challenge — especially when it comes to the dirty things she wants to do.
No two women are the same in this regard. But the good news is that if you are willing to take the plunge and open the conversation, and combine it with respectful exploration and acceptance that there will be some trial and error, then the payoff will be huge.
For instance, some women may love being called naughty names during the heat of passion, while others may recoil upon hearing those kinds of words.
It may take some honest discussions before you jump beneath the sheets together to get a grasp on which words are off limits. She Wants Uncontrollable Desire Feeling wanted by the man she adores that would be you is incredibly arousing to most women. In a study conducted by Cynthia A.
Let her know how badly you crave her when she least expects it, to heighten her feelings for you. Send a naughty text message to her during the day. Better yet, get specific: Your colleagues must be drooling ;. Or put her on the kitchen counter, your desk, the bathroom sink, you get the idea… 3. Many women find the act of performing for their partners a major turn on, but others may need a bit of encouragement.
Telling her how hot and sexy she is and that there is no greater turn on for you than seeing her naked is a great place to start. The Magic Wand is, to many, the biggest deal in vibrators. Originally released as a personal massager in , the toy took on a new life as a clitoral vibrator due after sex-positive feminist activists realized its powerful motor worked perfectly as a masturbation aid. You may have seen this one appear in porn in the past — it's been called "the most recognizable sex toy of all time.
The Rabbit AskMen Recommends: If the Magic Wand is the most recognizable sex toy, the Rabbit might be second. Combining a clitoral stimulation vibrator with a vibrating dildo, the Rabbit aims to please both inside and outside by hitting her clitoris and G-spot simultaneously. This isn't for every woman, but if she's into penetrative sex and a powerful overload of sensations, the Rabbit is a real knockout.
Speaking of both internal and external stimulation, the We-Vibe Sync is a great, high-tech option to provide both — while allowing for penetration fingers, penis or dildo simultaneously. That way you can both enjoy the vibrations simultaneously. Think of it like sex on steroids. Did we mention it can be controlled remotely via a remote or an app on your phone?
There are two ways to go about it: Pull her close to you by grabbing the fabric of a loose T-shirt. Take a firm grasp of her backside and slip your fingers into the waist of her yoga pants. Pull them down, smiling at her all the while, kissing her stomach.
Again, the desire you convey towards her here can be infectious. That you want her so badly can also eliminate any self-consciousness she may normally feel about taking her clothes off in front of you. Tenderness here is key. But unfortunately many women are still conditioned to believe sex is dirty, that multiple sexual partners is bad and desiring something other than vanilla sex is wrong! However, sex that's a bit on the rougher side can be very enjoyable for both partners. She may also enjoy you sidling up behind her and slipping a hand around her torso to cup her breast as she faces away from you.
Or, the two of you could explore spanking. You may even want to begin over jeans or underwear first. Fingers together with a cupped palm will increase the noise without increasing the sting.
Relaxed fingers with a flat palm makes more of a slapping noise and increases the sting. It is also very sensual to follow each slap with a short massage or a kiss to the same area. Consider titillating her under the table the next time you take her to a restaurant by subtly sliding your fingers up her thigh… The surprise will excite her and having this secret naughty thing you are doing between the two of you will turn her on.
While definitely not for everyone, lots of women do fantasize about it — and the freedom surrendering brings. Blindfolding and bondage can be a powerful turn on because in addition to the element of surprise they bring, it allows a woman to let the man take all the responsibility and blame for the sex they are having.
As much as things have changed, and as ridiculous as it may be, large portions of society still believe that a woman who really enjoys sex is a slut. Bondage is seductive to many women because it allows her to feel that she couldn't stop what was happening even if she wanted to. In other words — she is innocent and being led astray and made to do naughty things by this strong, sexually confident man.
Just remember not to rush her into anything and always be safe. And remember the point of the restraint is to increase the sexual pleasure for her. There's a reason blindfolds are seen as a BDSM staple — taking away someone's vision in bed requires a lot of trust, and the vulnerability of the blindfolded partner can be incredibly sexy. Plus, it can be easier to fantasize when you can't see any of what's happening, giving your roleplay an added layer of intensity.
If you're new to BDSM and kink, blindfolds like this one are a great first step. What's bondage without actually putting someone in bondage? If and this is a big if your partner is into being tied up, this rope is a great option to do so without giving her rope burns all over her body. Even people who like a little pain with their sex think that's a bad idea. Order this ASAP rather than just grabbing whatever rope lying around — it's super soft while remaining strong, and lends itself easily to intricate knots.
Want to take things up a notch? Using a ball gag certainly isn't for everyone, but if being unable to communicate verbally during sex is a turn-on for her, this one is a great option. With three different sizes of balls, you can find the right fit for her mouth; while small holes in the balls will ensure continued airflow. She may wish to pretend key word: Whatever it is, role play can be a lot of fun.
Experiment with the dialogue, get into it, and most importantly have a good time. She Wants You To Go Downtown Most men although maybe not you believe great sex means their penis is the large, erect, star of the show — capable of endless hours of pumping and positions.
However, Ian Kerner, Ph. So, if you really want to be an amazing lover you will take these words from clinical sexologist Ian Kerner, Ph. At the end of the day, open communication — in and out of the bedroom — is often the best aphrodisiac of all.
Cunnilingus is scary for lots of guys — they don't know where to start, they feel pressured to pull off something they're not sure if they can, and so forth. If you know that you're a novice when it comes to giving her oral sex, but you want to improve, consider signing up for an OMGYES membership.
Launched in , OMGYES is a pioneering site when it comes to female pleasure, offering you step-by-step tutorials and clear guides for becoming a master of her pleasure.
Let your tongue do more than just talking by letting it glide along hers as you exchange an intense, passionate open-mouthed kiss. Be sensitive to her comfort level with the oral exchange; of course, if she pulls away you should stop. A passionate kiss communicates desire, amplifying the arousal level of both partners. Some rules of thumb for tongue twisting: Avoid jabbing and stabbing her mouth with your tongue; instead, gently rub one side of your tongue against the top of hers; switch it up by pulling out and then slowly delving back in with the tip of your tongue; switch the position of your head tilting it right to left and throw in a few passionate close-lipped kisses to confirm the mutual desire with the pressure of your lips pressed together.
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