My entire body is washed with a wave of the warm-and-fuzzies just writing the word. For me, going down on a woman I love often feels like sitting down to a steak dinner after 40 days in the desert.
In my research for this article, it turns out that a lot of i. Some men seem to be absolutely hopeless with oral sex.
This is all good news for you. Want to give a woman the best oral sex of her life? Here is the low down on going down. Make sure she can lie back and let every muscle go. Lightly massage , touch, and kiss her whole body. Tell her what parts you find sexy. Lavish her with genuine praise. Let your excitement show. Just as important as making sure she is physically comfortable is settling in and ensuring that you are physically comfortable.
I mean it… get comfy. Creating Dynamic Tension Some guys will jump head first off the high dive into her lap and start lapping her up like their lives depended on it. This leaves room for you to build the intensity and experience, much like a musician. A piece of music rarely starts with the crescendo. Otherwise there would be no payoff. All my favourite songs build slowly, rising and falling, adding more elements along the way, until they finally explode in flourishing sonic orgasm.
The simplest, most on-point metaphor for this was given to me by an instructor of Tibetan Tantra. Imagine that your sexual arousal is a pot full of water. Men have a tiny saucepan, while women have giant stockpots. While a guy can happily hit a rolling boil in no time at all, a woman needs more time to heat up.
By starting slow and switching up the intensity from high to low, and low to high, you create sexual tension, which eventually spills over in the form of orgasm s. Working The Clitoris The clitoris is a gateway to some of the most insane levels of peak pleasure a woman could ever experience. It has around 8, nerve endings, which is more than twice what the penis has.
Women can sustain orgasms of length and intensity that men will simply never know caveat: The little pea-shaped bulb that pops out over top of the vaginal opening is actually just the tip of it.
Rhythmically massaging this area before or while using your tongue is a great way to stimulate blood flow and add to the fullness of sensation. That said, the tip of the clitoris is definitely a magic sweet spot. There are two most comfortable ways to do this: Wrap either arm around and over her thigh and place your thumb and index finger on either side of the clit.
With the tips of your fingers pointing downwards to create ample room for your mouth 2. Give the little cutie the attention, love, and respect it deserves. Techniques Warm her up by keeping your touch gentle and slow-motion. Kiss, lick and tease her thighs and the sides of her pussy. Softly make out with it exactly like you would her mouth.
Stop and use just your fingers for a little bit. Trace slow circles on her clit, then switch to rapid lateral micro-strokes, as if you were trying to gently rub a small stain out of your t-shirt. Using your middle and ring finger together works best here. When you go back to using your tongue, add a finger or two to stroke her G-spot on the first few inches of the upper inside wall of her pussy. Try matching pace and pressure with your fingers and tongue and then contrasting slow, firm strokes with your fingers and rapid flicks of the tongue.
Once you build intensity, slow way back down to how you started out and then quickly build back up. Playing with differences in speed and pressure will give her stronger and often multiple orgasms. You can increase the oral intensity once in a while by flexing your tongue and leaning into her while you lick. And always avoid using your teeth at all costs. There are no hard-and-fast rules here for structure and order.
You just have a toolbox that you can pull and switch from whenever you choose. Notice what makes her breathe harder and deeper.
And just like it is for men, the more the person giving oral is truly into it, the hotter it is and the faster the recipient will likely hit climax. Relax Your Jaw Stamina is the biggest key to great oral.
One of the biggest secrets to being able to stick with it is to totally relax your jaw. The tendency most men have while licking is to clench up, which is what causes most guys to quickly burn out and not make it to the payoff. Let it hang completely loose and flick your tongue independently of any jaw tension.
If you cramp up easily, you may have a lot of stored jaw tension that you need to release. Or, you might be able to dial back stimulation for a few seconds and then ramp it right back up again to bring her to climax. Again, listening and paying attention to her response throughout is key. But as a rule of thumb: Take your time getting into position and building sexual tension with your level of relaxation and excitement about the process.
Above all else, listen to her and enjoy yourself. Giving good oral sex to a woman is a knack. Like any other sexual skill , all you can do to develop it is practice and repetition. It takes some time to be able to tune into a woman and intuitively read her arousal blueprint. Keep calm and lick on my friends. Dedicated to your success,.